Thursday, March 13, 2008

My leg is cramping

So I can't type for long, without getting the heebie jeebies. I took calcium and zinc and D but it's taking it's sweet time kicking in.

Dahlings.....the Dyson DC15 Animal truly kicks ass. With only doing some basic vacuuming so far, like the hallway, and the middle bits of the room----the entire canister is filled with dirt. I could knit a brand new cat with all this fuzz and crap.

And that was the part of the carpet I thought was clean! I love this thing. Seriously.

The fridge is shiny brushed aluminum, bottom freezer, french doors, and a whole lot of of cute dials and buttons and things. No ice maker or water dispenser because they are unnecessary and they cost $1000 extra. For a $1000 I can make my own ice thanks. Still, it's so large I could get lost in it. The washer and dryer are front loading high efficiency, with a steam cycle and on platforms so no more bending over to load and unload. And they are RED. I've never had a new washer and dryer before. So cool. (And yes, all this stuff is very energy efficient, uses less electricity than the old stuff, so maybe it counts as green, not red, eh?)

And now for the sad whiny part of the post.

My thyroid bloods came back normal, so I'm back to square one. I had to do that 2 hour GTT this morning after fasting and it was awful. That orange junk tastes like crap and they won't let me do the jelly beans! Logically I know I'll probably be fine, but I'm really unhappy at even the thought of having to do even one more fucking needle. Even if it is just skin pricks on my finger.

It's not fair. Why can't I be normal? What in fuckin' hell did I ever do to deserve this?

Regular women get to be pregnant whenever they want, and have as many kids as they want, and they don't have to do anything except paint the damn nursery to have a baby!

And right now, all I want to do is cry and whine and moan. And of course, my husband is not feeling like listening because he thinks it won't happen and it's no big deal, (denial boy marches on..) and the real life friend I told about this basically told me to suck it up and shut up because I should just be grateful to be pregnant. This random piece of cruelty from a woman who never ever had an issue with reproduction and only had low risk pregnancies. I felt like smacking her. She probably wonders why I keep telling her I have to go and can't talk on the phone anymore. Gee, anyone out here surprised? I'm not even sure why I still speak to her after she implied that my occasional donut and hot chocolate probably either caused my previous pregnancy losses or they might've caused something to happen this time. Or how she got mad at me for saying that I don't feel like going to see Juno....I didn't even tell her how much I hate it. Just said I didn't feel like watching it based on a few reviews from some other people and she launched and started yelling at me I had to follow her opinion instead. Sigh....I do not need this right now.

I'm sick of worrying about this because I've had just about every other issue in pregnancy. You name it, I've had it. Except for GD. NOW it happens? Now?!? This?!? On top of every other medical issue I've had to go through, I get more crap on my plate. Haven't I been through enough?

Unfair, uncool, unhelpful, evil in fact. Shit. I'm going to bed and crying myself to sleep.

Maybe I'll distract myself with the new appliances and the workman arriving tomorrow. I need something.

9 comments:

  1. Some people are really bad at saying the right thing. Really bad.

    Bea

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  2. I really hope you don't have GD... it sucks having to poke your finger a minimum of 4 times a day!! Not to mention learning a new diet... although, that part isn't too bad. It's just the stupid finger pricks... and the hassle of it all.

    Do you have a nice bath you can soak in? Floating around in some warm water helps me sleep better!!

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  3. GD sounds awful. I wish you were getting more sympathy from your 'real life' friends (the non-internets people). But there's still a chance the test will come back ok. I've had the 4 hour GTT done several times with different results, but never looking for GD.

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  4. Your GD will be fine and it's not a big deal. Did you fast properly this time? Did they take your blood before? and after you drank the rediculously coloured goup? Personaly, the GD test bugs me because I think it's just not based on real regular levels..........the insomnia however has me baffled since the thyroid came back ok.

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  5. Damn Aurelia, you don't sound good at all lately! You're worrying me :( The Dyson sounds great but you sound completely stressed, poor you, I hope its all nothing and you get back to complaining about leg cramps and heartburn.

    Rest up my love, XXXXXXXXXXX

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  6. Just vent it all out, you are allowed to complain especially when pregnant.

    I'm sorry you are having such a hard time of it, the only positive spin is that there is an eventual end to this. Hang in there and complain as much as you want.

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  7. You are a strong woman and you will make it through this. I know I can say this from "the other side" of all those needle sticks and you might want to throw something at me for saying it. But I feel like the cheerleader at the end zone...cheering you on all the way to the touchdown. (I apologize for the sports reference...all boys in my house...I think they've killed the girly girl in me).

    You can do this. No matter what happens...you can do this. And when you're holding that lovely baby in your arms, all the frustration and anger will melt into the background. I promise. Just hang in there.

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  8. I don't know why this all has to be so difficult.

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  9. Your 'friend' is an ass. Break up with her.

    But oooo shiny appliances. Delivered already? Very exciting. I loooove that fridge. It totally had the same feeling when I opened it - like you could LIVE in there.
    You've got a house of boys so you really need that.

    I think I need that vacuum.

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