Tuesday, February 12, 2008

A little more news

I'm not sure if it's good or bad news but we know a little more now. My husband arrived at the hospital and saw his brother in the ICU early this morning.

He is still in a coma which they say is a good thing for now. They hope to finish cleaning his blood by tomorrow using dialysis and then try to wake him. The prognosis is fair to good, though we have no idea what the permanent damage might be, if any. His heart and bp are stable for now.

Trouble is, that if they are able to remove all the poison from his body, but they leave him brain damaged for life, a walking shell---this is frankly, not the ideal situation IMO. My husband thinks that the doctors there are doing a really great heroic job and are doing their best to save him. I guess I'm just feeling nervous because I'm wondering what that hospital's version of "saved" is....I've seen many severely brain damaged adults who end up as vegetables in nursing homes, or on the other side, adults who simply can't function properly. They look fine to the outside world, but are afflicted with serious personality changes and serious cognitive dysfunction. Can't work, can't be around their families, rages, anger, other issues. My husband logically knows all this, and he would hate to see this happen as well, but some Doctors just won't tell the family the truth, they lie, they omit, they are afraid to break the bed news, and the result is the family thinks the patient will be fine. But they really really aren't.

We'll know more tomorrow, for now, we wait. Not my strong suit. My husband will be away at least until Sunday, and of course, we have yet another major snowstorm rolling in....and my house is in disarray, and my kids have lots of activities and appointments scheduled. And just now, my oldest gave up on his homework and is in tears. Apparently, definitions of spelling words are just overwhelming at the moment. I can hardly blame him.

On the bright side, I saw Dr.Placenta and since I'm doing so well, so incredibly amazingly well, he told me to just see my regular OB from now on in. If anything looks funny on my US's I can come back, but for now, the baby and my placenta look healthy.

Such a bizarre thing for me to hear, and such a bizarre place for me to be in. The baby is fine, and my brother in law is dying. I feel like Alice in Wonderland...up is down, and down is up.

Our take away message for the day folks----the next time you wonder if suicide is the answer, remember that you may not succeed. In fact, you may wish to god you had succeeded, because there ARE worse things than death, and much worse things than taking a pill and talking to a Doctor.

So don't do it. Just don't.


  1. My fingers are crossed for things with your BIL.

    I am happy to hear that the pregnancy is going so well.

  2. Excellent news from Dr.Placenta.

    crossing all crossable appendages for your BIL. Hoping Mr.Cotta will be spared hard decisions.

  3. There are worse things. Let's hope it turns out well for your BIL.

    But great news from Dr P.


  4. Oh, Aurelia, I'm sending good thoughts to your BIL. What terrible news.

  5. Wishing you super-human strength right now.

  6. thinking about you and your family

  7. Prayers for your BIL, and the rest of you. Great news from Dr. Placenta.

  8. Alley, I clicked on your blog the other day, and it's gone!

    I saw the last post, but didn't get a chance to comment, please email me and let me know if you are going somewhere? Are you okay? I can't find your email address, I thought I had it.

  9. Yay Dinky!

    Unfortunately this situation with your BIL reminds me that I need to get that DNR drawn up stat.
    Can you send me the name of your guy please.

  10. I am so sorry about your BIL. I will hope for the best but also for the not worst. Sadly I know from a friend-of-a-friend's experience that there, are, indeed, worse things that succeeding at suicide.

  11. what a horrible time for bil's family, I truly hope he is ok... x

  12. I hope it truly is good news for your brother in law. And I am so happy to hear the pregnancy is going well.

  13. ....been in that wierd place before.....guilty for being healthy and prego...watching someone die....the resulting reflections can be difficult. Take care of yourselves.

  14. I'm sorry to hear about the tragedy with your BIL.

    I'm very glad to hear your latest consult went so well.

    Alas, no words of wisdom.

  15. I'm new to your blog and I'm so sorry. I'm not even sure what to say. I think your last paragraph should be typed on a poster and put in every high school and psyc ward world wide. It's terrifying.

    On you other news - YAY! I'm excited for you to get good news. Healthy babies are what we all pray for:)

    I'll be back.

  16. This is so, so sad. Suicide or attempted suicide destroys so many lives -- and not only of the person who tried to kill himself.