Thursday, April 23, 2009

Hey God, It's me Aurelia

Dear God,

I am not blogging very much right now God, because I haven't got anything even remotely cheerful or positive or happy to say.

I actually kind of wish it was just my perception of life or just my mood because then I could do something to fix it, but frankly I can't this time.

My kids are all miserable, and my husbands family is insane, as is mine. From the outside, it looks good. We have money and a good business, even in this economy, and three live healthy lovely kids.

But--you know God that things aren't always as they seem. Soooo, I have a request?

Could you help my brother in law get an accurate diagnosis? Get him back in the hospital, off of ALL the psychiatric drugs he is on, and maybe, just maybe a Doctor who has read a medical textbook or knows something, could get involved? And help him.

And then maybe my husband would feel less angry and stressed and freaked out. Maybe we all would not be fighting tooth and nail about him all the time.

And yeah, there is more---could you help my older son Kaz as he goes through puberty? He's friggin killing the whole family. Tantrums like a three year old, except he's almost 13. I know it will get better when he turns 18, but right now--Oh Lord, I just don't understand this stage at all.

Give me patience.

Give me strength.

Or at least give me a chance to take a time out and a valium when I have none of the first two left.

I'll write more when I don't sound like such an ungrateful whiny bitch, ok?


  1. Right there with ya on the teen thing, lady and am not finding 14 any easier (he's actually almost 15, god help me). Sometimes, I'm embarassed to say, I wish we had enough cash to consider boarding school.

    I think the British have it right. ;)

  2. A doctor who could help??! LMAO.
    sorry babe.

  3. I think someone should implement a teenager exchange program - you know, you could trade for someone unrelated to you who might behave well in your home.

    I hope your BIL can get some quality treatment.

  4. Patti beat me to it... if I didn't know so well how you feel about summer camp, I'd suggest boarding school too.

  5. Sorry things are bad - I hope they improve soon

  6. I'm so glad the teen stage is still far far ahead of me. I suppose terrible two's are peanuts in comparison, they're just around the corner.

  7. I have read that there are a huge number of parallels between the toddler & teen stages, so your comment about tantrums like a three-year-old is bang on. Your husband, however, I have no explanation for (but sympathy -- sometimes I think my husband is making up for the lack of toddlers in our life too). (((hugs)))

  8. Hang in there and don’t let these things get to you. They will pass…

    But in the meantime, let’s break things down:

    1) Insane families
    If they’re truly insane there’s nothing you can do but roll with the punches (so to speak) and if that’s more than just a figure of speech then it’s a more complicated problem that needs to be addressed in greater detail. But if they’re just bog-standard loco, well… join the club.

    2) Brother-in-Law’s Diagnosis
    It’s all too easy to get messed up with remarkably poor treatment when it comes to mental health issues, but solving the problem isn’t anywhere near as simple. As counterintuitive as it may sound, your brother-in-law (the one who’s apparently screwed up, no offense intended) needs to take charge and demand proper help (he may need some assistance to back him up here), but in doing so, he also has to be completely honest and forthright about what’s causing him grief and anguish in the first place. The best thing might be to insist that his GP refer him to a psychiatrist and then go from there… (And my apologies if I’m just missing the boat here or you’ve already been down this path before.)

    3) Kaz & Puberty
    Face the fact that you’re in for some tough sledding for a while. Don’t take his outbursts too seriously because a lot of what’s probably coming from him is pretty irrational and dopey. So acknowledge his petulant diatribes, and misdirected anger, etc., but don’t react instantly to any provocations (as instinctually tempting as that might be) and try to avoid spiraling into confrontational situations where you just both end up at loggerheads. Take deep breaths and suck it up. See if you can’t catch him offguard with some gesture that shows you care about him and let him know you’re there to support him rather than being an overtly antagonistic martinet. Not that I’m suggesting you are, but he might see it that way. Kids…

  9. Whoops! You mean I'm only supposed to blog about POSITIVE stuff??!!??
    "you know God that things aren't always as they seem." <= Amen to that! of course I feel guilty bitchin' when by all outward appearances I should have it M*A*D*E, but that's part of why surfin' & bloggin' is helpful to me...

  10. my daughter is 12 and is now beginning puberty as well. im with you- prayer and valium! as for dysfunctional families - i feel your pain. things are never what they seem from the outside looking in.hope you had a good trip!