Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Phony, phoney telephony

I have just learned about Google Talk. I've tried to use it but so far I can only call and can't figure out how to hang up. Unfortunately, this means I left a 10 minute voicemail for someone that involved heavy breathing, and lots of, "Is this thing working?", not to mention the ever famous, "Can't you two children stop fighting? I'm on the phone!" And they laugh at me, and say, "You aren't on the phone, you are at the computer. What is that thing on your head?"

And, "If that's a phone, why does it have a cord?"

I have no reply for that. They are of course, right. This online-skype-google-phone-with-free-long-distance-as-long-as-I-pay-a-crapload-for-my-internet-DSL will NEVER take off as long as it involves a cord. (Mostly because there is an entire generation already born and walking around who have never seen phones with cords.)

I know something is supposed to ring and let me know there is a call, but where does it ring? And how do I put out the garbage, cook dinner, garden, unload groceries, switch laundry loads, and go pee & wash my hands while using it if I'm tied to the computer by a cord?

Yes, I pee while talking on the phone. AND SO DO YOU, DON'T LIE!

If we are really good friends, I'll admit it, otherwise I'll just tell you I'm washing dishes and the running water in the background is the tap. But secretly, now you all know the truth, I never wash dishes!

Okay, now what do I do if one of you calls someday and I really AM washing dishes, hmmmm.....

Pictures are my other great accomplishment this weekend. I have finally discovered how to get the photos from my new digital camera off the camera and onto the computer. Not sure what comes next....you all seem to do amazing things, but the manual for this puppy is 98 freakin' pages long so it's not so easy. I finally found the red-eye reduction button and auto-flash this weekend after taking 170 photos of red-eyed alien people in darkened rooms.

Next ambition, I may attempt to post photos on my blog.


I have PMS or a horrible sudden onset mental illness that only comes once a month. Which means that in order to get pregnant, I may have to go back to my fertility clinic. I think my fantasy is dying on the vine here people. My last Day 3 FSH was 22. They may not return my phone calls. Of course I have another RAIU coming up so radiation might be bad around fetbryos and eggs right? *Sigh*

Very funny blog post here written by a fellow ADDer. Choked on my 2006 Wolf Blass Yellow Label Chardonnay, which tastes like lighter fluid BTW. Back to the 2005 Valdadige Santa Margherita Pinot Grigio I think. If we're celebrating AF coming, we may as well get drunk on the good stuff.

And pee it out while talking on the phone to our friends!


  1. That was a very funny post, I'm LOL here! Yes I do pee sometimes while on the phone... I admit it! At least we aren't as bad as Mr. B, he often goes for a number 2 while he's on the phone to people! Plop! WHAT WAS THAT???

    Enjoy the wine, sorry that old hag is coming!

  2. ALL RIGHT, I do, just hush about it, not everyone needs to know!!!


    If you need any help uploading photos... Are there any of you BTW? :)

  3. I have a cordless phone for Skype. It works really really well. Definitely cheaper than ground phones, which we've abandoned thus it makes financial sense. The phone did cost $70 US, but in the long run it's saving us. You have to use the "red" hang up icon, if you just close the software, you'll stay on the line which is annoying.

  4. The base and computer are on the second floor, as well, and the thing works all the way out to the back of the back yard. It's awesome. Computer does have to be on though - there are phones for which it doesn't but they were like $100 more expensive at least.

  5. Really, there are cordless phones I can buy?, Yayyyyyyyy!

    I must go out and look for this. I assume the base plugs in somewhere on the computer, and I just merrily go on my way with the handset?


  6. Yeah, and you can even get a handsfree contraption for it. We got ours at RadioShack.

  7. My brother just sent me a bluetooth USB dongle for my computer so that I can use my handsfree earpiece from my cell phone.

    And I definitely pee on the phone. In today's world, you just have to multitask! But I only do it with my nearest and dearest. Or telemarketers.

  8. I use Skype as well but find the cord soooo frustrating- and of course I pee when I'm on the phone!

    I'm definitely going to find me one of those cordless ones!

  9. I totally pee when I am on the phone!

  10. "If that's a phone, why does it have a cord?"

    OK, now i feel SOOO OLD.....


  11. Heh... you know what's funny. I've kept your heavy-breathing message because it's SO DAMN FUNNY.