Friday, July 25, 2008


I have a dozen things to blog about, but I'm not sure I should blog about any of them. I think I'm getting an allergy to controversial IF/pg/loss stuff. Is it just me, or is the only acceptable comment on a blog these days, "((Hugs!))"?

Which makes the internet pretty fucking boring I think....hopefully this cycle will pass.

So Kaz wrote me a letter, saying he was alive at camp, and that he really really wanted me to send him some candy. So we are.

A gigantic box that will likely be confiscated because all the counsellors are freaking about childhood obesity. Even though none of that applies to my kid at all. He is still underweight, maybe fifth percentile. Yet everywhere he goes (school, camps, etc) he gets the lectures about not eating things that make you fat, and we have the worst time EVER finding clothes that fit him. All children's clothing is now marked for vanity sizes, and husky is the only type allowed.

There are overweight kids here and there but most of the ones I see are average or only slightly chubby. I really don't see how banning all treats helps, or lecturing about diets, or banning things. Me, I like the middle ground, letting most kids have one treat a day, and the kids who can handle it get some more. But no lectures......

I went to see my ob/gyn the other day for a good bye visit. We talked about my poorly healing uterus and the whole c-section vs. vaginal birth issue. (Eeeeeek, run away here people) Basically, he hates the never do it approach, and he hates the always do it just in case approach. (This is why I like him, he has sense.) Both delivery methods have risks, and even with a planned c-section you could end up like me, facing an u/s, a possible MRI, months of physio, pain, more pain, and did I mention----pain.

I needed my section, but make no mistake, there is a cost. Oh Lord, I can't function, can't lift a thing, even my big healthy baby. What if you didn't need it, and just scheduled it for convenience, or because you were afraid of a VBAC and ended up like me instead of all those other people who tell you how easy their section was?!?

Note the irony people: for 6 years my arms have ached to hold this child, to rock him to sleep, to carry him in a sling, to hug him, and cuddle him.

My arms were empty, and because of the c-section they still are. Sigh....

If you see Posh Spice anywhere, punch the bitch for me, k?


  1. heh. (((hugs))) I am sorry.

    Ya know I think the thing about controversy is not everyone is up for the ugly truth all the time. I have come to understand this more over the last year. Sometimes we just need to vent. It is hard to know something you think ultimately the person needs to know but delivery it at the appropriate time, either online or irl.

    You know I found a note last night about a drs appointment months ago when I requested a referral to your ob. yeah. Where is that? Could I be more bitter at my healthcare providers?

  2. yes internet I am aware I am practically illiterate
    I am not even going to attempt to go back and fix all of that.

  3. Taking the bait and disagreeing with the lectures and the food bans. Where we are the kids are obese, not just chubby. Parents are rewarding with food. Who else is going to teach these kids to eat and move (exercise)?

    We know from tragic autopsies that children have artery calcification. One of the problems with that is that the calcification is permanent.

    And while I have more sugar around my house that I am pleased with, the reality is that sugar is just another white powder. It's deadly (just slower) and addictive. Not to mention that sugar doesn't mix well with many ADHD kids.

    **and just to make sure my tone comes across okay {{{hugs}}}. My comment is meant as a general comment and not meant to attack you personally.

  4. Oh I cannot even get into body image issues.

    If I traveled in any circles that got even remotely close to Posh, well, I'd do it for you. Probably not, actually. I might not realize it was her even. Probably the only female celebs I might actually recognize would be Jennifer A and Nicole K, and they don't deserve punching.

    My heart is breaking for you, thinking that you still feel empty arms. I am so, so sorry you ended up needing an emergency c-section. As much as they suck, I'd rather have my dilators and heating pads....

  5. Definitely happy to punch Posh Spice.

    There is a difference between the healthy eating approach and the food police approach - sometimes it feels as if the teachers etc have lost their ability to tailor the message to the kids in front of them.

  6. Thrice, no worries, I understand, it's just that I have kids who do eat broccoli, so if they want to eat a little chocolate too? Ehh, why not?

    And yes, Betty they do seem to have lost the ability to tailor the message.

  7. I know how you feel re the comment thing. I do leave the more controversial comments occasionally (eg if you are devastated to be having triplets, why on earth did you let your doctor transfer three embryos), only to be met with a deafening silence. Yes I'm a bitch, sometimes (it's ok, that's less rude in english) but I'm also quite often right.

  8. Oh no, those hugs usually make me vomit a little in my mouth. Please no. I love your analytical tack to most issues.

    I'm sorry your section is causing such trouble. It's so unfair that all these problems don't just end already.

  9. Just so you know, you can write more than HUGS on my blog if you want. If I say something back, it's never meant in a hostile way.


  10. Must figure out what on earth a VBAC is. Very Big Arduous Conundrum?
    Don't worry, google will tell.

    Luck would of course have it that YOU suffer complications with something otherwise considered a convenience. Arg.

  11. You hit the nail right on the head. I'm hesitant to blog about loss issues these days because all I'll get are people saying how sorry they feel for me. Yes, that's nice and all, but I would far rather be analytical than get all sorts of [hugs].