relieving the suspense

We paid some awful amount of money to temporarily fix the roof, and cleaned up all the rotting drywall and water. We hope it will last 6 months, but really it will only last until the next thaw, when another leak comes up in another spot. Husband is slowly accepting he will have to actually reno the house, and use the plans the architect is now rushing to do. Slowly. Some more ceiling needs to fall on his head perhaps? Dunno...

Dr.J. was not helpful. And she usually is. So disappointed. She thinks that I should LOWER my estrogen even though every single time I do that, I bleed like mad. She wants me to take only progesterone even though that makes me shake and get the jitters. Then she wants me to go off of everything for a week (Hello, divorce!) and then go on the pill, which is never enough estrogen for me. She does not seem to understand that in a woman with severe ovarian failure like myself, I do not produce any hormones on my own. So of course my moods are affected. And mood altering drugs don't help that. ADs, whatever, cannot make up for organ failure!

They'd never say this to a man who had kidney failure and was experiencing side effects of the disease.

Never.

Oh, and at first we could not understand the ultrasound report, because it said I had one fibroid and two normal looking ovaries, and some other weird stuff. Then we realized that someone had messed up my report and transposed the measurement numbers. Sigh....plus they did not note the position or placement of the fibroid, and so we can't do anything else. I have to go back for an ultrasound and a saline hysterogram. In case the fibroid is inner, or if I have a polyp, or scar tissue. Total fucking waste of time.....could have done this last fall if I had a requisition. And she did not give me a referral to an OB/Gyn because she wants to wait and figure this out. Thing is, unless it's urgent, I have to wait. And if I had a referral last fall....sigh...

Next, the entire family is sick and exhausted. We have colds and bad throats and Mr.Cotta is getting a man-cold, which as we all know is much much worse than any cold a woman could ever get.

And my son's school? The new high school which demanded all that testing and documentation and said they would move him up and give him more challenging work? Not quite.....they don't do that for anyone. Ever. Except that's a lie, and they did do it for a kid in his class in another subject and they do it for lots of people. Except that it's too late now. Except that "ooops", turns out we've been asking them to do this since last June and it's not our fault their heads are stuck up their asses and they were too disorganized to figure it out. I honestly don't get it. My poor husband feels shocked because he can't believe they are screwing this up.

If Einstein went to this school, they'd tell him to go to the back of the bus. They are really that awful.

January sucked. And if Julius wasn't here and learning how to crawl all on his own and being amazing, February would suck too. Poor Kaz, poor Mac, poor me and the house and Mr.C. If only grown up life were as simple as learning how to crawl...