Quick update

We had to go back to the hospital this evening, everything started to get much much worse.

We're home again, with a stronger antibiotic, and some codeine. We had another ultrasound, and they still saw blood flow going to all the necessary parts which means things are still working, but I'm still freaking out. We are not out of the woods. I can't wait to see my pediatrician tomorrow. She is a gem, and knows that Mac is utterly stoic when in pain. Unlike the bonehead urology resident....."Oh, he's fine, look he should be screaming if I do that, and he isn't." Uh duh, this is the kid who cried for one minute only after he broke his nose after running face first into a concrete planter. He's not going to ever let YOU see him cry, asshat. He'll wait until you leave, and then quietly let one tear fall while snuggled in my arms. (And if you know that something makes a child scream, then don't fucking do it, at some point it's not medicine, it's sadism you cruel bastard.)

Oh, and Doc, when mothers tell you their kids are acting oddly, the rule in peds, is always always always LISTEN to the mom. She may not know exactly what is wrong, but if she tells you something is wrong with her kid, then something is WRONG with her kid, so don't patronize her. Like when you used extra big words to try and prove how smart you were? Uh hello, Mr.Cotta speaks Latin, and I know how to interpret Pompous Ass, so maybe you should stop while you're ahead and shut up already?

Remind me to go back and beat someone with a stupid stick when this is over folks.

And since you all know my usual dark humor method of dealing with terrifying stressful moments, I'm going to share the little ditty that has been stuck in my head, playing over and over and over again. This video ad for Fruit of the Loom has the tune.

(Yes, I am deeply warped, you're surprised?)

Ting-a-ling, God damn, find a woman if you can.
If you can't find a woman, find a clean old man.
If you're ever in Gibraltar, take a flying fuck at Walter.
Can you do the double shuffle when your balls hang low?

Do your balls hang low? Do they swing to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Can you throw 'em o'er your shoulder like a Continental soldier?
Can you do the double shuffle when your balls hang low?

Do your balls hang low? Do they swing to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Do they make a lusty clamor when you hit them with a hammer?
Can you do the double shuffle when your balls hang low?

Do your balls hang low? Do they swing to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Can you bounce 'em off the wall like an Indian rubber ball?
Can you do the double shuffle when your balls hang low?

Do your balls hang low? Do they swing to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Do they have a hollow sound when you drag 'em on the ground?
Can you do the double shuffle when your balls hang low?

Do your balls hang low? Do they swing to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Do they have a mellow tingle when you hit 'em with a shingle?
Can you do the double shuffle when your balls hang low?

Do your balls hang low? Do they swing to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Do they have a salty taste when you wrap 'em 'round your waist?
Can you do the double shuffle when your balls hang low?

Do your balls hang low? Do they swing to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot? Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Do they chime like a gong when you pull upon your dong?
Can you do the double shuffle when your balls hang low?