I've had breakfast made by hubby and the kids, gotten a few homemade & a few store bought presents, (more on that later, chuckle), and they are all busy making me dinner. There are many sloppy kisses and lots of love.
It's all great on the surface, but of course, a few things are missing.
Like 3 children, a son and two daughters who should be here.
Like my own two mothers, neither of whom are really my mother, but both of them are sort of. I am unmothered, self mothered, I'm all grown up, but the yearning for that mothering I never had is still there.
I yearn for my lost children. I love the ones I have, but they can't replace what I missed, and am missing. It's unfair to them to put them in that position. I do wish something could replace that empty spot in my heart though....I just don't know what it would be.
For those of you who are still searching and yearning, my love to you today.