yep, we're alive

I've had a very very long week, mostly punctuated by the pain of a UTI, and a fundraiser I worked on, essentially my last hurrah.

Since Monday night, I've been trying to catch up on my sleep, tossing and turning all night and napping during the day, complete with drooling on my couch pillows (soooo classy) and feeling like a fog has descended upon my head.

Good thing: we raised a lot of money and everyone praised my hard work to the skies.

Bad thing: some stranger was a stinker and stole an entire bag of tools (hammers, screwdriver set, etc....) that I had brought from home, along with all of our supplies for next year's fundraiser. Not expensive to replace, maybe a couple of hundred bucks, but still, I'm feeling grumpy about it. I don't feel like shopping to replace it all right now, and I'm also the kind of person who hates it if someone steals even a stick of gum from me. Petty, I know I need to let this go. I would gladly give someone whatever they need, they just need to ask....but fuck I hate thieves.

Anyway, feeling grumpy now, so here we are 35 weeks + and according to various friends who have been pregnant and would know---the baby has dropped, and I look very different. It's supposed to be a relief, and make it easy to breathe, but it doesn't feel like it. I am panting loudly at dinner and sound ridiculous, plus I snore at night insanely. ( I think I look like a golden retriever at dinner every night...am so elegant.) The pressure on my bladder is getting worse, what with the giant baby head pushing on it and the UTI and the crazy pants they have for pregnant women these days. (What insane person thought that a tight elastic band running directly across the pregnant bladder or a tight band of fabric in the same place then attached to a giant elastic tummy covering was so fucking brilliant?) Has no one ever heard of loose and roomy? Sigh....meanwhile I look oddly flatter and lower and keep waking up in terror that the baby has shrunk. I know it hasn't but still--so odd.

At this weeks OB appointment, my urine was normal, but my hands and feet are swollen, and my BP was 120/62, not great on the upper part, I'm hoping that treating the UTI and getting some more naps will help.

One of my many male in-laws is trying to be supportive but feels very awkward about my pregnancy and keeps telling me stories about his pregnant mare and comparing me to yes, you guessed it, a horse. He is normally very erudite, very intelligent, very articulate, and very kind. He is Mr.Cotta's closest relative. He is also driving me insane. Why are men so awkward about pregnancy?

I've had so many odd comments from guys, and a couple of male friends who just act funny....like the guy who pointed and asked if my stomach size was an aberration, or the guy who said that this fundraiser must be a great way to distract myself from sitting around and staring at pictures of little footprints. *eyeroll*

I give up on this shit, I really do. Grieving mothers don't just sit around mooning all day at mementoes of our babies. Sometimes I look at them, but pretty rarely. Mostly on special anniversaries, otherwise it all stays put away. But, I guess to him, we must be the freaks of the world. Personally, I think he's the freak, for saying something so idiotic in a casual conversation, but maybe I'm just being too sensitive?

The women have been nice, especially a couple who kept telling me that I don't even look pregnant from behind, and that I only look pregnant in the front. Several gushed, very good for my ego. I knew it was crap, because I can look in a mirror and I know what back fat is....but who cares, I'm happy to accept the compliments, right?

I just find it bizarre that the only men who have said nice things to me in months, have been a security guard who told me I look lovely, and several gay men who told me I was glowing with joy, and like a walking ad for pregnancy. Made me blush! Eh, I should add Mac to this list as well, because he has been so cute and so nice to me. He keeps telling me I look beautiful and hugging and kissing my stomach. His older brother---ahem, could use some lessons in this area.

Anyway, next task is to finish buying/ordering stuff for the baby's room. At this point almost nothing will arrive before the baby is born, but I should at least order it all, and get the carseat and a few other things. I really do have to get myself in gear on this, never mind all the items needing repair all around the house. Of course, it's hard to repair all of that when I have no tools....